Today, I could absolutely burst with happiness! This year has been absolutely fantastic so far- I’m living in the city of my dreams and every single day is a whole new experience. Something as simple as a quiet walk back home at midnight is so fulfilling and amazing.
I feel so much! I feel nostalgic for these streets as I walk them; an untold, unexpressed understanding that I will not be here forever, that makes me thirst and pine for more. I try to live harder… take every step more surely, with purpose..blink less, in order to see more, and exhale slowly to keep this feeling in me longer.. I love it so much, it almost hurts.
On some days this is the Italy I dreamed and yearned for, the cheese, the gelato, the street-performers, the churches, the cobblestone streets, the trams, the music in the speech.. other days it’s just another place.. a place where people are busy with their own lives, a place where the supermarket lines are always long, a place where cigarette smoke mingles so naturally with the smell of roasting chestnuts, the mundane with the beautiful, a crowded metro, a relaxing day at the park… it’s just another stage in this confusing, terrifying world.
I love when people come up to me and ask for directions, I love knowing what to order without even looking at the menu, I love when Italian just springs to my mouth when I’m animatedly talking about something. Looking at tourists taking pictures make me smile, the pigeons annoy me, the novelty has worn off, and in the remains there lies a fierce sense of love for this place that on some days feels just like home.